I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I would totes reciprocate the nip pic, but I'm sick with a piece of tissue shoved up one of my nostrils and I'm just not feeling that ambitious. Sorry.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
Randomize