well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
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Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
I used the light from the first guy's text notification to be able to snapchat the second guy in the dark. I am too good at juggling guys.
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I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
The doctor basically called me a dirty dick.
I now have a "weirdest thing a guy ever did in bed" story. Cut my fingernails.
Yeah I'm gonna need you to stop it right there.I know this is supposed to be a safe space but Imma have to exit.
I just got woken up by that guy wearing a Krispy Kreme hat giving out donuts
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
it's okay that you two hooked up in the family bathroom at the mall.. i just pray to god you were not making a family in the family bathroom..
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