i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
Its what happens when I drink whiskey in a sweater. It makes me feel mature and ponderful.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Glass of stolen champagne in a to go cup = tastiest hangover cure ever
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
Remember how I was complaining about how no guy has ever gotten me off?
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
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