so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i dont care if it was her birthday. if she leaves me with a half rack of budweiser and her boyfriend obviously shits gonna go down.
Under someone's bed. Not sure whose. I think they're sleeping in it.
There's a treasure map on your stomach. Treasure may or may not be the clothes you lost...enjoy
I had to help some 40 year old women shoot down some 21 year old who called her his "milf fantasy"
id one day like to live in a world full of emotionless and wonderfully fullfilling sex...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Haha sweet. I'm being the Mad Hatter. I'll be drinking out of a tea cup all night. Or at least until I inevitably lose it, break it, or use it as a weapon.
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
He got the life proof phone case so he could jack off in the shower without his wife knowing
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
yea, she was legit pissed that her rasberry vodka ice cubes never actually froze. but we couldnt convince her otherwise.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
Randomize