Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
So I have some interesting news. The pizza guy called the cops on me...
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I dunno. Last time I went there I had got sexually propositioned by a Belgian prince.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How did you get a free t-shirt at the strip club?
I was attacked by whores
You threw up on yourself again didn't you?
They were strong whores
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's been awhile, you pregnant yet?
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
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