Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Her parents hate her and she's on like major lockdown. All her friends are in jail and she has massive pit stains. Dude... It doesn't get much worse than that.
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
making my second box of kraft dinner for the day. thinking about telling him how much you cheat on him so that you end up having to spend valentines day with me. i'm sorry its every man for himself.
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Help everyone's hot
Men are hot women are hot non-binary people are hot aliens are hot
Whiskey and tits go great with anything. Especially fire.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
I told him I was ready for another round and he said, "after this part." What guy chooses James Bond over pussy?!
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
somehow I wound up on the floor crying about his beard. then telling everyone I'd give him a "lesbian blowjob".
If you find out what that means, show me.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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