"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I just gave my patient permission to swallow while pregnant. She was so embarrassed to ask...but her bf was really happy with the answer.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some how when im high sleep beats hunger...its like how paper beats rock it doesnt make any fucking sense but it still happens
I don't know where I am but there are firefighters
There's a level of bonding between people at the liquor store at 10:30 in the morning that's unrivaled
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
I'm beginning to think I'm sterile because I definitely should be pregnant by now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The sound guy for the band told me id make a great valentines gift for his bisexual girlfriend
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
yeah people on the adjacent balcony, Im naked drinking outside in 0 degree weather at 1pm. got a problem?
I think I'm gonna cut my hair just so I stop waking up with semen in it
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