i wish mother nature was an actual person cause i'd bitch slap her for sure
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
My cat puked at the same time as me. Makes me feel better about myself, except he can stand and I can't.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she keeps a pillow, blanket, and a pack of saltines under the bathroom sink, for "rough nights".
mowing the lawn. still drunk. If my dad doesn't appreciate this I swear I'm dissowning everyone including him
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She gave me a rubber ducky to make me feel better while I was throwing up.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
It was the needle in the haystack of teary, unpleasant handjobs.
Nate is still in lock up because when the cop informed me he'd shit his pants in the squad car I declined to post bail.
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