Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
I woke up at 5am and he was watching me sleep... Come get meee!!??
i was just texting to let you know that my facebook chat is working again so you can talk to me more. please talk to me more.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
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He licked the chalk off his shirt, then spat the Mountain Dew from his mouth onto the shirt and sucked on it. And thats him sober.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
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Guy pissing in the corner in downtown Boston as his girlfriend is covering him up, yelling "relationship goals"
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
All the movies on cable here are either porn or Bollywood. I am never leaving this hotel.
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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