She wants her shit back. Clearly she missed the cheaters-get-their-shit-ritually-burned clause.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Turns out I sent a dick pic to my sister's ex. Grindr is the devil's eharmony.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
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