Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
I dont think he stole the pillow. I mean if he wanted a souvenir, my thong was on the nightstand.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
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No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
What's the tour de bar? Is that a thing, or is it just what you call Saturdays?
christmas shopping: 3 hours in the liquor store...
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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