Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I knew it was gonna be a rough night when the guys next to us at Relay for Life started shot gunning beers and yelling "This ones for all the hot chicks that went bald because of cancer". It kinda went downhill from there....
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
How the fuck do you get a noise complaint filed against you at 9:30am on a fucking Tuesday?
I mean, it's a romantic picture of pubes if I've ever seen one
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
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