and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
grad school is all the worst parts of undergrad, without the binge drinking and bad decisions to make up for it
... there are chew marks on my license. I have no idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Be careful there's warming lubricant on the floor. I will clean and explain later.
WHY IS EVERY MAN IN THIS CITY GAY? IS IT SO BAD TO WANT TO BE TREATED LIKE A PIECE OF SHIT BY A REALLY HOT STRAIGHT MAN FOR A NIGHT?
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
Dude a gay guy just Sparta kicked this Samoan guy for calling him a flamer you need to get down here the free kamakazee shots haven't even started yet
I'll seduce him with my charm, after all, I am a graceful swan.
More like a demented cow.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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