So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
like when he blacked out and we found him in the garden eating your tomatoes off the vine
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
I also love my swipe to text changed a singular vagina to a plural vaginas. like my phone somehow knows I secretly want 2 vaginas
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
last thing I remember was someone walking in on me sitting in the bathtub listening and singing along to Britney spears "Till the world ends" on repeat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
Things that happen while I poop: I start dating someone
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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