My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
Well I'm going to a gay club in my banana suit. You should come. My bro is going as a pirate. I don't know if there's a theme.
i just woke up naked on my porch, holding the neighbors cat in my arms.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
I guess I just got drunk and ordered a mini fridge off the internet. At least now I know the 200$ that was missing from my checking account wasn't spent on lap dances only.
Just abandoned him for a bowl of soup and the living room floor...hope the window replacement guys don't get a show..I miss you!
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
at least I have the sex noises of his roommate to entertain me while I wait for him to wake up
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
If the river was whiskey, it would be the best river ever.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
Randomize