how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
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He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
The cops just drove by on their loudspeaker going DO NOT DRINK THE WATAHH
I love boston
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
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found a better reason to procrastinate than the usual sunday-don't-give-no-fucks. literally every one of my textbooks is soaked in captain. can't turn a page without gagging.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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