I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
"The real world" DC house is on the corner of 20th and S. Wanna come with to check it out? It's my goal to be a blurred out face in their hot tub.
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
Think worst case scenario and then dress sluttier
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Yeah. Rock bottom was him passing out and saying "are you putting a condom on me?" and me covering his mouth and saying shhhhh
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Then, he ate me out while I watched Bo Burnham. Best. Night. Ever.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
Only good thing about the 50 Shades is that it is now completely OK to call a credit card co to dispute the charge for nipple clamps that didnt arrive.
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