Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
I couldn't deal, she's a vegetarian. Every woman should like a little meat in their mouths.
when a girl says 'did you just try to kiss me' you should leave the bar. trust me.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I literally have been drunk for three days entirely by myself, the world cup may kill me
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
like stop trying to get a relationship out of this when i'm clearly in the drunken mistakes part of my life.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last time Jon threw a party I woke up on my porch, no shirt but 4 bras on, and "make better life choices" written on my stomach in sharpie
I pulled up iMessage on my computer and I'm pretty sure two people in my class saw that dick pic you sent. Sorry!
We're super invested in me shitting to my full potential
He literally cried into his tacos and screamed fuck bitches. Don't know if it was the best, or the worst hook up, ever.
Today's forecast: 90% chance of bad decisions, good stories, solid new dick and artichoke pizza
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
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