i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
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Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.
Exactly. This is the bit where I learn a heartwarming lesson about not making my drinks half vodka
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
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And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
He has a baby picture of himself on the night stand. I don't think this whole 'one night stand' thing is for me.
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
So the same great-aunt that told me to freeze my eggs for procreation just told me that I should strut around the dance floor b/c I'd get picked up.
I need to meet your family.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
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