If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
Dude i thought about you literally the second after I came. This friendship is starting to cross some serious boundaries
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Jacob lost his virginity in a threesome. I am deffs fucking this kid.
DURING A THUNDERSTORM ON HIS BIRTHDAY.
Jesus these cramps...it's like every potential fetus I swallowed last night is personally punching me in the uterus
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fuckin wine wasted last night. Found my pants in the toilet this morning.
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
We were mid fuck, and he did a Kermit the Frog impression. Is it weird that I was strangely turned on?
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
*swallows 40 gallons of heavy water and astral projects into buzzfeed* Top Ten Reasons Why I Am God
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
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