Most of the time people just stick whatever they want in my mouth. Thanks for letting me decide this time
Found out in my property law class that you can sell your eggs for $8000. Helloooo spring break.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
I just used "et al" in a sext. I thought you'd be proud
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In an unrelated matter, im gonna eat you out so much later.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
One singular head for man, one giant climax for mankind
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
after the ketamine those signs on the bathroom door had little meaning to us
Randomize