Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
How many times a week can a couple have a threesome with the same guy before it becomes some sort of 3-way relationship?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
i robbed the continental breakfast last night
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
Either I spilled whiskey on my boobs last night or they are fermenting. Not concerned in the slightest
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
A boy just offered to come over and help me clean my house. I hope you are more successful than he will be tonight.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I woke up to a gigantic ft-long tootsie roll and a note by drunk me with the words "you're welcome"
We’ve got a propane heater on our back porch if you want to come over and eat a McRib in peace
Randomize