Texts From Last Night

• Favorite

  (248): View more from Michigan

  I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (248): I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob? http://tfl.nu/efyh
  Replies (44) Good night (713) Bad night (3331) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (804): View more from Virginia

  You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (804): You can tell a man will be prosperous by the power of his farts- A fart that can shake the room is a voice that can change the world. http://tfl.nu/i0as
  Replies (13) Good night (2260) Bad night (788) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (251): View more from Alabama

  the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (251): the only reason he called me tonight was because I fertilized his crops on farmville. http://tfl.nu/cwli
  Replies (37) Good night (1088) Bad night (4953) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (507): View more from Minnesota

  So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (507): So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there. http://tfl.nu/r47h
  Replies (10) Good night (5705) Bad night (567) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (604): View more from British Columbia

  fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (604): fuck he's narrating my life in a british voice make him stop im way too fucking high for this http://tfl.nu/yh2h
  Replies (10) Good night (4628) Bad night (1046) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (610): you know you've made it when it's your own pool table you're waking up on http://tfl.nu/unra
  Replies (20) Good night (6175) Bad night (986) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (952): View more from Minnesota

  Is he smart?

  (1-952): View more from Minnesota

  Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (952): Is he smart? (1-952): Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half. http://tfl.nu/hxnn
  Replies (20) Good night (5844) Bad night (1020) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (313): View more from Michigan

  remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (313): remind me in the morning to get the random kid out of the closet and to clean the pudding off the wall http://tfl.nu/brex
  Replies (11) Good night (4208) Bad night (791) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (847): View more from Illinois

  I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (847): I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face http://tfl.nu/ydcz
  Replies (13) Good night (4184) Bad night (675)
• Favorite

  (312): View more from Illinois

  The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (312): The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin http://tfl.nu/3kj0
  Replies (3) Good night (736) Bad night (2606)
• Favorite

  (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (+44): If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong. http://tfl.nu/d9uh
  Replies (26) Good night (821) Bad night (6159) Order T-Shirt
• Favorite

  (612): View more from Minnesota

  Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (612): Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie http://tfl.nu/901f
  Replies (3) Good night (2338) Bad night (670)
• Favorite

  (513): View more from Ohio

  Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (513): Dude that girl I hooked up with Tuesday is in lecture. I told her I was from the Dominican visiting my cousin and was leaving the next day. Hiding under my hood and hangover. http://tfl.nu/8660
  Replies (8) Good night (1534) Bad night (649)
• Favorite

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory...

  (1-215): View more from Pennsylvania

  just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!"

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (215): I just got a nosebleed on a date at the cheesecake factory... (1-215): just run out of the bathroom with blood gushing down your face and scream "ITS IN THE CHEESECAKE!!!!!" http://tfl.nu/238t
  Replies (10) Good night (2180) Bad night (384)
• Favorite

  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.

  Press ctrl+c (windows) or cmd+c (mac) to copy the text to your clipboard

  (501): I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something. http://tfl.nu/os86
  Replies (0) Good night (422) Bad night (174) Order T-Shirt

Randomize