Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
i have it on good authority that she is not as good at giving head as she claims she is
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By the way, playing "guess who I had sex with last night" was a great way to start a Thursday, or any day
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
So looks like I applied to adopt a dog last night. I'm completely ok with this
Know what the best part of waking up for work after a drinking vacation is? It's an easy question. Nothing. Nothing is the best part of that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just me, my martini, and my backup Martini.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize