We won't sleep together?
He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
I am the Bobby Fisher of drunk asss puking
No see this is how It goes: guys will fuck virgin girls. But girls don't really want to fuck virgin guys. So you're good have no fear.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Fell off bed. Face first. 10 stitches. huge scar on forehead. totally going to start telling ppl my parents died fighting Voldemort.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just cut open the plastic package of a Plan B pill using the bottle opener I carry in my purse. #whyidrink
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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