she said she'd blow me if I bought one of her sorority raffle tickets. Goddamn it's gettin easy
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
Idk how she did it. Either she watches freakier porn than I do, or I really need to go get tested.
It is official. It's the year of doin married chicks. Similar to the year of virgins but without all the baggage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
eating chex mix on the couch when he walks in naked and asks how he looks. are you shitting me.
I'm going to start charging you rent if you keep leaving your random conquests on my living room couch the morning after
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
Hi I'm on my way to give you multiple screaming orgasms and Easter candy
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
Randomize