But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
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I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
It's now 3:30 and the guy I went home with is showering me with shredded cheese. Nbd.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
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We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
I just want to have sex that doesn't end like a B-rated horror movie.
conclusion from last night: i should wear boob glitter more often
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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