Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
i barfeds in our rink
Since when does wearing a condom and going down on me make someone a gentlemen?
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
dude, I feel like I need to get my gf's roommate a gift. something that says, sorry you walked in on me getting blown. suggestions?
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
Dude. Get me out of here. I'm surrounded by glitter-faced 40 year olds in halter tops. The desperation here is so thick you can taste it.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I stepped in puke last night then washed it off my shoe with beer. Is there a grace period to respect before wearing them to class?
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
Does it still count as a threesome if one girl left halfway through cause we were having too much sex?
Fuck you for even being able to ask that question
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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