Did your girl go home? Did she have fun? Can we have our friend back?
I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
i am making flyers for the homeless letting them know about free chipolte day
How does, "Im sorry I was such an intoxicated bitch, I didn't mean anything I said" sound as an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
I didn't know I was invited to an orgy.
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
dude can you explain to me why i woke up on your sisters floor with moutain dew and chips everywhere
i dont know im at your house.
I’m on my way to fuck the new hockey player
Ride him like a Zamboni
Randomize