fuck, i think i'm broken. Alchyhol air mattress = the suck.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
Apparently last night drunk me put my phone in a cup of beer to make it "fun scented".
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
Did you sleep with Connor? And who undressed me? There's a picture of two guys peeing out my bedroom window. What happened?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
obviously he wasnt ready for this jelly and you can quote me on that
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
So how does one go about leaving their family vacation to hang out with someone they met on tinder
Randomize