Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
and all i could think about was how mcdonalds would not be open anymore after we were done having sex
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
I screamed so bad because I thought he was going for my sandwich forgetting it was in my hand
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just had empanadas for breakfast while watching Wall-e with my yesterday's one night stand mother AND grandmother.
You were drink-wine-from-the-bottle drunk trying to take everybody's blood pressures again.
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
I don't think anything is more terrifying than the thought that you might shit your pants in front of your boss
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
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