i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
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I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
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The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Well I've made a drinking game out of the Wiggles but I think I've got this babysitting thing down
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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