I mean, you're like my second best best friend we're so close I can't believe you'd do that to me
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
He was so drunk that he tried to backflip off a baby chair.. How do you think that ended?
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
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You better have your party panties on Saturday!
Why only Saturday?
Well I have an AA meeting Sat morning so I'm going to try to take it easy Fri.
i walked in the apt and she was vacuuming. i asked why and she said so we could have sex on the floor. i love clean freaks.
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
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But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I love when my neighbors have passionate, loud sex to remind me that I'm not getting laid
dont go in the freezer to fetch your weed. my vibrator may or may not be in there. not sayin, just sayin
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