Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i love how i spend my mornings exploring my phone to see what i did last night.
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
im not sure what exactly happened but i may need help faking my own death
I need to stop getting in the car with my dad when im rolling balls. I think he's starting to notice my eyes aren't usually completely pupil
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I made out with a guy because he ate a grape lollipop and he tasted delicious... not my proudest moment.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
You left your hot dogs in my dresser again
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize