i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
You should imdb "mourning wood" to see what I'm doing with my $80,000 English degree today
Honestly I'm not even that excited to see my boyfriend. I'm more excited to see his penis. His penis inside of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
Dude. I’m playing chess through iMessage with a stripper. What has my life become.
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
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