My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Forgot to mention...Pamela Anderson has HPV, so i feel like im in good company
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No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
Of course I have a pirate flag
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It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
im mad at you for telling me he ejaculated during "let it go." Thanks for ruining the song forever.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I literally just ordered a gold medal online that is engraved with his name, "01.01.16", and "BEST SEX EVER"
He said we were going to get fucked up in the woods so here we are
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
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