i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
you were like "guys ... i think i got fingered while dancing tonight"
our poor poor cab driver
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Sad realization: so long as I use this sleep apnea machine, I will never be the little spoon!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it bad I have to get shitty ass drunk on a Monday night because I can't adult?
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Say whatever the fuck you want about me, but leave my deceased cat out of it.
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
wow. that really looks like a penis. not a top hat
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