when i was 16 reading the aftercare instructions at the piercing place i wondered why they would ever think to warn me about getting semen in my bellybutton
then i met college
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
you asked "if this appropriate to take the the bathroom?" while holding up a bottle of vodka when you went to pee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I recommend you throw your keys as far as you can in one direction, your phone as far as you can in the opposite direction, and hold on.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
Our friendship would be less complicated if your dad didn't think I was forcing you into having gay sex with me
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
He is so sweet! He thanks me for sending him dirty pix. I should keep him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
i'm gonna crowd surf you onto his dick
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
We are literally scheduling phone sex... if that's not long distance af then i don't know what is
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
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