Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
So...we accidentally left a bag of puke in your sister's room. Heads up.
Thanks to blow jobs, my margarita's at the bar are only 3dollars.
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We see some guy emerge from the forest on the island this morning, alone, in only a snuggie. Morning shots and bagels on us for the number one walk of shame.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
That kid i sell weed to just had his mom give him a ride over here she waited in the car while he bought a bag
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
my neighbors having band practice on sunday morning is a message from the universe that I should stop drinking
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well it's like a wise man once told me: "If you're going to shave your balls, don't do it hungover."
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
It should be perfectly legal to tase anyone not wearing a mask.
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