i was so high last night that i actually googled "how to get un high"
if you ask that question again our friendship is over
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
We're using joints as your birthday candles
After a long night of drunk sexting I have to the ninja roll at the front door to see who showed up.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
I think my fortune cookie is telling me I give good blowjobs.
are you really asking me this. do you KNOW how many times i masturbate in a day? yeah. wrong person to ask about romance.
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