We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I mean I woke up wearing my bathing suit which blows my mind
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Update: I only have one shoe. The other one now belongs to the gods of jello-wrestling. May it rest in peace.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Like please, take your microdick and try to stick it someplace else. It is not welcome in my world.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I've broken 3 vibrators in the past month because I apparently am "too rough" with them. Is that even possible?!
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
I woke up in a boat, with a life jacket on, tons of beer cans and no lake... I was inside a garage. WTF
Randomize