Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
New all-time record for most uncomfortable I've ever been. A midget just asked me to restrap his fanny pack in the bathroom.
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wait, how is it that I'm just getting ready to go out and you're already showing your penis to freshmen girls?
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
youre not allowed to be friends with girls ive double teamed. period.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
yea last night was a repeat of newyears...exept this time it ivolved a fish costume, throw up, a hole in the roof, and cops...lots of cops
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
He lasted about 30 seconds then said you can't win them all. But then he made me pancakes so it's okay. We shall call him mancakes.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
My liver is whispering mean things about me to my kidneys. It's a fucking miracle I'm not hungover. Lol
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
I’m done with him. I’m going to the beach to catch a fresh dick
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