Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
my 3 favorite things in life are tequila, dicks, and making sandwiches. that DOES NOT make me a bad person.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
For every drunk face picture you send me, I'm gonna send a wholesome family photo.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
Sorry, i'm on a strict diet of vodka and regret
My roommate made maccoroni last nigh dropped the bowl off the counter knocking it into the dog bowl he picked up the dog bowl and started eating it claiming it was te worst Mac and cheese ever and if he wasnt so high he would stop eating it hahahaha
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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