Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Just found my shirt from Saturday, got an automatic contact buzz.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I swear to God, if you drunkenly correct my grammar one more time, I'm cutting you off.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
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