WE WERE REALLY IN A PORNO LAST NIGHT
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
All I remember is holding on to the elevator asking it politely to stop spinning
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
We were in the middle of fucking and she was just like "Do ya wanna play Harry Potter Scene It?" I musta been really bad lol Anyways, her tattoo healed nicely.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I woke up in my neighbors backyard with glitter on my teeth and sparklers super glued on my bra. which part was your fault?
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
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