She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
You were yelling in my ear let's double team her with her right next to us
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
i'm gonna friendzone myself so you dont have to
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
Randomize