Texts From Last Night

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  (312): View more from Illinois

  Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita.

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  (312): Come back if u want to. I'll do some dirty shit to u mamacita. http://tfl.nu/kc15
  Replies (6) Good night (2458) Bad night (997) Order T-Shirt
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  (570): View more from Pennsylvania

  we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.

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  (570): we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up. http://tfl.nu/su5y
  Replies (20) Good night (3693) Bad night (376) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  clearly you have your priorities straight

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  (612): just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON (651): clearly you have your priorities straight http://tfl.nu/87z9
  Replies (68) Good night (4445) Bad night (1123)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow

  (410): View more from Maryland

  so basically your not goin out tonight?

  (301): View more from Maryland

  who said that?

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  (301): dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow (410): so basically your not goin out tonight? (301): who said that? http://tfl.nu/qimw
  Replies (13) Good night (5258) Bad night (831)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up.

  (925): View more from California

  "half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking.

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  (541): mom and dad are asleep. time to fish my half-full bottle of wine out from under my bed and give this christmas visit a pick-me-up. (925): "half-full" seems a little optimistic for the turn your night is taking. http://tfl.nu/v25q
  Replies (3) Good night (2716) Bad night (749)
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  (301): View more from Maryland

  Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent

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  (301): Gave a homeless guy 3 bucks earlier. Just saw him at the bar. He bought one beer and left. Happy to see my 3 dollars was well spent http://tfl.nu/21ar
  Replies (8) Good night (3117) Bad night (1612) Order T-Shirt
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  (914): View more from New York

  I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.

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  (914): I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem. http://tfl.nu/p4yj
  Replies (3) Good night (1076) Bad night (542) Order T-Shirt
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have

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  (727): I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have http://tfl.nu/1hgx
  Replies (2) Good night (999) Bad night (446) Order T-Shirt
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  (310): View more from California

  I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient.

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  (310): I wanted to be mature but the vodka was resilient. http://tfl.nu/0squ
  Replies (1) Good night (1140) Bad night (326) Order T-Shirt
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  (530): View more from California

  red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.

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  (530): red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song. http://tfl.nu/0nv8
  Replies (10) Good night (1864) Bad night (419) Order T-Shirt
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  (501): View more from Arkansas

  I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.

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  (501): I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job. http://tfl.nu/8e8h
  Replies (10) Good night (1790) Bad night (380) Order T-Shirt
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  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Love me.

  (781): View more from Massachusetts

  GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS.

  (508): View more from Massachusetts

  Just for one nugget?

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  (508): Love me. (781): GO THE FUCK TO BED IT'S 3AM I AM NOT TAKING YOU TO MCDONALDS. (508): Just for one nugget? http://tfl.nu/9y03
  Replies (6) Good night (2590) Bad night (568)
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  (314): View more from Missouri

  I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.

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  (314): I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling. http://tfl.nu/0c6k
  Replies (6) Good night (738) Bad night (507) Order T-Shirt
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  (609): View more from New Jersey

  And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny

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  (609): And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny http://tfl.nu/jdju
  Replies (3) Good night (712) Bad night (577) Order T-Shirt
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  (612): View more from Minnesota

  He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...

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  (612): He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard... http://tfl.nu/5xwe
  Replies (8) Good night (474) Bad night (819) Order T-Shirt

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