I totally thought the tree was playing the guitar
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
A letter to the campus apologizing for being sucha cunt with a picture of her head on it. All posted around campus.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blacked out last night, but left myself a note that said "oops on oops on oops" that can never be a positive
I'm wearing a utility belt filled with alcohol
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes, you can go into Petsmart drunk but the cats awaiting adoption don't appreciate the soft pretzels squeezed through their cages.
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
I was informed this morning that I took all my clothes off and ran around the whole apartment complex. Being as they just moved in, welcome to the neighborhood.
not only was there glitter in the toilet after i peed, but there was some on the toilet paper after i wiped. this cant be healthy.
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
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