i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
Thirty seconds is a long time in jizz time...
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
You microwaved all of my silverware, I don't care if you spent all your money on tequila, you're paying for this.
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