Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
hey sry I lost all my numbers who is this?
pat the guy you slept with
still need a last name
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 4 pm and I'm already way past my preferred quota of "could have died" moments
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No if my life depended on you fingering me just let me die
I woke up in confetti... confetti and shame
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Mass text: You have all failed me. How have the people I loved so much let me go so long in life without ever eating a McRib sandwich?!
Randomize